It’s a process

Today is the fourth anniversary of my surgery, the day I began many long months of recovery and treatment and recovery from treatment. Coincidentally, it’s also National Cancer Survivors Day. I’ve been a bit stubborn about adopting the “survivor” label, but I think it’s time. I don’t have cancer any more.

It’s a process. Cancer is a process. Treatment is a process. Healing is a process. Surviving is a process. The process has been hard on me these past few months, harder than I thought it would be by now. I needed to remember that it’s different for everyone, that we’re all on our own timeline. I needed to stop and rest, stop plowing ahead.

It took a while for me to realize that for me, healing and surviving isn’t simple. It’s hard work. Careful management of my lymphedema, the leftover effects from chemotherapy, a seismic shift at my job, and losing my mother — my plate is full. I’ve been working on it. It’s a good process.

So, today is the fourth anniversary of my surgery… I’m looking back, but I’m right here. I’m trying to be right here.

Peace Love & Yarn Bluebird BFL Sock Yarn (Thank you Liz!)